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09 May 2008
The things we’ll miss in summer
CHRIS LAKEY, EDP SPORT
Summer's here and the time is right for. . . sitting in the back garden, actually. Weekends just won't be the same without those fortnightly trips around the country, admiring the passing traffic on motorways, being robbed at bun-point for a coffee and a cherry Bakewell - and then watching 90 minutes of pretty average footy before doing it all again on your return journey.
Oh, for the bleak winter days.
But then along comes something like Sunday afternoon at Hillsborough, where the reception for the retiring Dion Dublin was absolutely superb. Those who were there won't witness many more occasions like that.
Sadly, of course, there wasn't one for Darren Huckerby. Plenty has been written about his departure from Norwich City, so here's my take: he deserved a proper send-off; the fans deserved the chance to say goodbye; it could and should have been handled better.
In the greater scheme of things Huckerby's story is another part of the rich tapestry of sporting life, as someone probably once said. We all have opinions on Mr H, as we do on everyone and everything else. Some have a little more time on their hands to ponder the last nine months of discontent … and what's around the corner.
He'll be missed. . . maybe
Ian Holloway
His comments are really funny, let's face it. “We're in this situation but it's nothing a couple of wins won't put right,” he said recently. Before Leicester were relegated. No-one was smiling at Plymouth when he walked out on them, then nipped back to nick one or two of their best players. You reap what you sow and all that.
Tony Pulis
Premiership bound - and hopefully he'll learn some respect. After Stoke vs Norwich he not only came out with the biggest load of old hogwash since Tony Greig's “We will make them grovel” taunt to the West Indies in 1976, he did it with such a lack of respect for everyone, standing at the side of a table obviously determined to get away from the media as quickly as possible. Stoke had “out-battled them, out-worked them, and out-played them,” he said. Wrong, wrong and wrong again, Tony. Hope you stay up.
That's got to be wrong. . .
The offside rule. Give us the old one back. The one that was clear. Or perhaps we could try a game without the offside rule and see what that's like. After all, Sepp Blatter's trying to outlaw the tackle, so it's not that far fetched is it?
Also, the wall-mounted hand-wash, typical of hospital wards, which greeted me at St Mary's. Is the media really the great unwashed? Was there any real reason why my hands needed to be even cleaner than they were? Was it foot and mouth or blue tongue they were worried about?
Will they ever come back?
North Walsham RFC
It's a bank manager's game. No, not at No 8. Those days are long gone. It's got money, and that's changed it (remind you of any other sports in particular?) Unless things change drastically at Scottow, there will be no quick return to the National Leagues, and Norfolk need a high-profile rugby team. Good luck to them, but I fear we have a long wait.
Derby day kick-offs
Proper ones, that is. Why play at noon on a Sunday when you can just as well play at 3pm on a Saturday? For those who say it's to prevent alcohol-related problems, may I remind you that alcohol has been sold in cans for quite some time now and is available from supermarkets, along with all sorts of other things that confuse teetotallers like myself. If you want to get drunk by mid-day on a Sunday it's easy. And while I'm at it, can we have it back on Sky please, so that 20,000 other Norwich home fans can get to see it as well?
Legs
Don't get me wrong, this is not sexist or anything, I just want to know whatever happened to footballers' legs. I'm not after a return to the days of tight shorts and big perms. I'm just worried that one day shorts will have progressed so far that they'll just be long trousers, big enough to host a party in. Jamie Curteon hasn't seen his legs since 1998, apparently.
Why didn't you just keep him?
Dwain Chambers' failure to make it as a rugby league player with Castleford means he may now decide to fight his Olympic ban for drug use. Chambers has twice tried and twice failed to break into American Football. Hopefully he will fail again, and won't be on a running track near you for a long time to come.
Planning for failure?
Why have the FA targeted only the semi-finals of the 2010 World Cup or Euro 2012. It's part of the FA's four-year strategic vision. Vision of what? To not win anything? I always believed sportsmen went out to win but, yet again, the FA have proved us all wrong.
PUB GAME? GET AWAY…
Is snooker up there with darts and pool as a non-sport? I don't think so - but I got into enough trouble when I wrote about synchronised swimming so I'm steering well clear of a major debate. Suffice to say, Ronnie O'Sullivan is just brilliant, even when he's not playing well. And when told that Steve Davis had mentioned him in the same breath as Roger Federer and Tiger Woods, O'Sullivan said: “And they reckon I'm mad.” Terrific.
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